Goodbye to my precious, little Mother

My Mother is no longer frail and sickly...

Mother died on Thursday Morning, 052710, @ 3:15a.m.  Her "closing" was actually very smooth and easy.  She did have 1 seizure for about 15 seconds, then for about 25 minutes, she just slowly stopped living .  No more struggles.  No gasp.  No gurgles.  ...just peace.

I sat beside her, along with my sisters: Beth & Patsy, talking to her, singing her favorite hymns, crying, loving her.  She wasn't alone....one of her fears.

I kept thinking and wondering...what was she seeing.  Did she see our Lord?  Did she see those who had gone on before her...my Dad?...her parents?...her brothers & sisters? 

It has now been 5 days.  I've come back home, about 4 hours from Mother's.  My husband asked me if I had read 90 minutes in heaven by Don Piper.  We've had a copy at our house for some time now.  I hadn't.  That's what I've been doing today.  Amazing.

According to this author's death experience, you do see people you know.  He names one after another of people that lead him into faith with our Lord that were there greeting him in heaven.  Childhood friends that died early on...family and others.  He describes bliss, peace and unbelievable joy.  He even went so far as to describe his Grandmother who was "humped" over with osteoporosis (like Mother) and how she was standing straight and tall and beaming with happiness.  That soothed my soul! 

I'm so excited for her.  She was very conscious of how her body was failing.  Weighing only about 95 pounds now, Mother had always been so elegant, classy, respectable.  See, mother was aways the ultimate in a proper lady.  She would "hand-sew" the alterations of her clothing, in more recent years,  to make it hang right due to her mishapened posture from her osteo.  She very seldom wore pants b/c she felt a LADY wore skirts/dresses!  Funny!  And ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS had lipstick on!  I know it may sound morbid, but even in her casket, she was elegant, "together" and cultured!  She would have been thrilled....trust me!  That made us all feel good.

She had picked out her coffin some 15 years ago and paid for it and her outfit to wear was pre-chosen by her to blend the colors!  Seriously.  It was all about the look.  And she definitely looked the part of a southern lady.  She would have been proud...right down to the lacy hanky placed in her hand to cover the discoloration.  Even though I've said through the years how crazy people are to take pictures of those in coffins...I did!!!.....but only b/c I felt like Mother would have wanted it!  I know our Mother!!!

Her service was just as she wanted.  And the people that came for her visitation/funeral was about 350 in number.  A very proper showing. 

People have said some very special things to us about Mother.  We knew...so it was no surprise to us, nevertheless it was nice to hear.  She was a giver, well respected and a mighty woman of God.   She was a Proverbs 31 woman without a doubt.  If only I can be a little like her myself.

Never again will I hear her little voice.  She would refer to me as "Baby Sue" or "Susie~Q" or "Sue Ellen" She called me a couple of weeks ago"".  She only talked about 30 seconds but said she called to tell me she loved me and that I should know that she always had....I did indeed.  I never felt unloved.  Never.  Mother was a wonderful mother who gave so her children could have things important.  Never were we rich monetarily, but we were in love, family and the heritage of Christian parents.  We were blessed beyond measure.

Goodbye Mother....you taught me much and I love you more than you will ever know.  Go be with Jesus...you have done well "thy good and faithful servant".

With love, Baby Sue

My Weight....ugh!

I'm so tired of my weight. 

Several years ago I lost about 40 pounds....effortlessly.  We bought a plant nursery and I left from a "behind a desk" job to the nursery.  It was a really small nursery with only 2 active greenhouses...but the daily walking, watering, planting, unloading pine straw....the normal activity of such a place....the weight literally fell off of me without trying.  Even after we closed the nursery and I went back to health care, I kept it off for the most part.  I became an avid walker.  I walked about 4 miles/day and usually about 13 minutes per mile.  That's pretty good for an old woman!  I really was addicted to it.  I found I couldn't rest at night until I walked so sometimes I walked at 10pm!  I know...sounds crazy, but not only is my neighborhood very safe, but also secluded from the outside world.  My fears were never of people but of "critters"!  We've been known to have a stray Bobcat in the "hood"...not a fan of being surprised!

Anyway, I had a hysterectomy in 2005.  At 1 week post-op, I decided I would try a mile walk...after all, I was use to such.  Big Mistake!  After about 1/2 mile...I thought I was gonna die!  I almost crawled back to my house!  Needless to say...that was a major no-no.  So, the Doctor did not clear me to walk until after 8 weeks!  By then the damage was done.  Walking was no longer an addiction.  The magic was broken.  For the life of me, I can't get back into the routine.  So my weight begun it's gradual slide UP the scale. 

See, when I was working at the nursery, I never changed my eating habits.  Hardee's Egg Biscuits and Cinnamon Biscuits for breakfast.  Lunch was hot dogs, pizza or subway.  Supper was a meal but I was usually so tired, I ate very little.  So with the lack of exercise/walking, the weight started to climb.  Every so slowly.  Now, 5 years post-op...I have gained 16 lbs from my then norm.  And actually, I lost an additional 7-lbs immediately post operatively.  I'm not counting those b/c I wouldn't be able to live with myself mentally!

Weight loss is never fun.  I am convinced that since I no longer have ovaries, and take HRT, that that is a big part in the numbers on the scales.  Also, I have developed high blood pressure to boot!  Literally, I'm falling apart after 50 years old!

I am the Queen of dieting.  I know how to diet, when to diet, what kind of diet...what I lack is the stick-to-it-tiveness of dieting!  Trust me, I've been on all of them.....Diet Center, Atkins', WW, Richard Simmons, Michael Thurmond's, Slim Fast, books on nutrition, diet pills....I could write a book...seriously.   They all worked as long as I followed them.  But the key for me in watching what I eat, writing it down and walking.  Simple, basic common sense.

I feel it coming.  I'm gonna beat this weight thing.  I refuse to let something get a hold of me and hold me hostage!  No, not any more!  I deserve better and am going to do this!

Last October, my 2 sisters and I went to Hilton Head Island for a week.  We promised that we would go again this year and that we would all have lost weight by then...significantly so.  Well, I haven't...but I'm going to.  The reservations have been made.  I've got 4 1/2 months until our week there.  Let the battle begin

Ephesians 2 : 10

10 For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.

Reality TV

I work hard...push myself...over stress myself, rush, procrastinate, panic, meet deadlines, miss deadlines...beg forgiveness...DAILY!  It's just me.  So, when I get home in the evening...I wanna relax.  I like to sit on my bed, lean against the headboard and watch TV, fb. blogspot, emails and surf the internet...all at the same time.  I'm a huge multitasker.  Tuesday nights are my favorite.

The Biggest Loser.  I've never watched a season of this show before.  I would occasionally turn and watch an episode, but never really got into it.  But I have this year.  Love watching it.  Amazing transformations.  Amazing.

American Idol.  I have been a huge fan since the 1st year.  But, something is just not "right" this year.  I've not been into as usual.  I ususally flip through it a few times to see who gets booted off...but after the tryouts, which I love, it's just been kinda blah.  I think I miss Paula.  Seriously.  And the fact that Simon is leaving this year...not so sure how it will be next year.

Dancing with the stars.  I've never watched, not even an episode, until this year.  It's been fun.  I'm not glued to it by any means.  But it's been fun to see some sorry dancing and the improvements.

So, that has been my Tuesday night line up.  I surf...and flip...and try to keep up...and to think I have DVR to boot!!!  Crazy me...

A Mother's Day to remember...

My emotions are over-flowing today.  I knew when I got home that I would have to write a little in order to process all of them.



Some of you know that my son's family moved this weekend.  It has literally been a whirlwind event. 

He has been the Tourism Director in our county for about 5 years.   Due to a better opportunity and career move, He applied for a position in Knoxville, TN, (along with other places), was offered the position out of 257 applicants, and within just about 3 weeks...they moved there.  Way "too much, too fast" to figure it out for me, not to mention that during that 3 weeks, I was out of town 10 days...so it has been a whirlwind for me for sure.  Seemed so fast, but they had been in nightly prayer about this possibility of a move for about a year now. 


We left on Thursday for Knoxville.  I rode with my daughter-in-law and the grandbabies, while Kent drove the moving truck and pulled the car and Robb drove the truck.  It's a 7 hour drive from here to there.  We got them moved in in 2 days and spent yesterday emptying more boxes and decorating...the fun stuff!  We really worked well together to get it all done. ..and filled a couple of dumpsters with boxes and trash! Look at the wall hangings for the Little Diva's rooms I painted... such fun!

The new home is lovely.  Until they sell their home here, they decided they needed to rent there.  They found a great family apartment (1300 sq ft) and the amenities are great.  Two parks for the girls to play in, a must,  a swimming pool, tennis courts...the works.  We live in a very rural area and they are definitely in the big city now.  Every place you would want to shop or dine-in, is literally at their finger tips.  Why, even the largest Mall in East TN is less than 3 miles from their new home!  Trust me, when you've lived in an area that is an hour's drive from everywhere...you appreciate those niceties!  


So today, on Mother's Day, it was hard to leave my son, daughter-in-law and precious grandbabies behind.  Knowing I would not get to see them tomorrow, or have Sunday evening "Sloppy Joe's" together as usual.  A new experience for me. 


My daughter lives about 1 1/2 hours from us.  She called several times our way home to check on us.  Everyone knew this would be a hard day.  I called to wish my own precious Mother a Happy Day today, but I'm pretty sure she didn't have a clue who I was, but she was very pleasant and wished my family a Happy Mother's Day.  I could hear Beth in the background coaching her and trying to "jog" her memory, but to no avail. 


But, that is the circle of life.  The Bible says..."a man shall leave his Mother and Father"...and that prophecy is true.  As a parent, I am so thrilled of Robb's success.  WOW!...what an amazing opportunity.  We would never want anything less than God's plan.  And they have followed God's guidance.  (My daughter in law blogs, check out their story of this adventure.) 

God is amazing...he never fails.  I've had the blessing of being in attendance at our grandbabies births, dropping by to say "Hi" and get a quick snuggle in, or dropping by to push them on the swing or having them at our home and having a Swan Princess Parade to the pond...great memories of  times passed...but forever in my heart.  I thank God for this opportunity...being the Mother, Mother-in-law and Grandma ZuZu and for all the great things God has planned for the future...and HE does have plans.

Fake nails....

I have fake nails.  I love them.  I hate them.  About once a year, I start wanting fake nails.  I'll put it off for a few weeks and then I go to Raleigh...about 1hour 20 minutes from my home.  Don't they have nail salons around here???  Yes, of course.  But not like this place, nor these types of nails.  These nails are called Solar Nails.  They are put on clear...the fill-ins are every 3 weeks, and they look real...seriously.  People ask me all the time about them.  I chose the American Manicure (no white tips).  I actually pass out business cards/flyer's to friends here at home and many have gone that far for this treatment.  It's so worth the drive.

Back to the nails.  After a few weeks, I hate them.  I hate how they feel, how long they get so quickly, and the fact that it is difficult to pick up things, open clasp on jewelry or scratch!  They get on my nerves.  So, I'm gonna take them off!  Then it will take about 6 months for the nail to grow out and lose the "ridge" that the filing has caused.  Argggh.  Then no doubt I will want them again!  It's a cycle.

The nail salon I go to is hands down the greatest.  That is why I go there.  I have never found another one like them...and I've been to a few over the years.  They are Vietnamese and it's a family business and everyone is truly so kind.   That, for the most part, is pretty average for nail salons.  However, they undoubtedly give the best pedicure around.  They are known for this  The pedicure takes 45 minutes...and they use hot stones and heated oil/cream for a calf massage all while you are sitting in an elite, cushioned, soft leather, vibrating massage chair...and give you a glass of wine...all for $25.00!!!   Unbelievable I know! 

So, if you're ever in the Raleigh...go to Lux Nails on Creedmore...it's worth the drive.

hmmm...I may have a bug

If you read my post from last evening, you know I wasn't feeling up to par.  Thought it was due to my hectic schedule of the last couple of weeks.  I have now decided I think I have a "bug" of some sort.  Having been without food since lunch yesterday, I awaken with the same full feeling that I went to bed with last night.  Not such a good feeling in the morning.  I'm attending a conference this week and so I'm not in my home nor routine.  So, after forcing myself to dress and get to the expo site, I forced down a pastry and actually started to feel like living again.  However now, about and hour later, I feel "icky" again.  Hate feeling like this when I'm not in my own home.  But alas, the sessions will be over @ 3:30pm and I will head home with my co-workers.  Life is still worth living.  Got to get better before tomorrow's schedule comes.....have a fun day!!!~~~Sue  (picture of Topsail Island...where I'd like to be today!)

I'm too tired to eat...

Well, I have been super busy for days...weeks, maybe even months now. It's all a blur. 

See, I've been on the run lately...alot.  I was in Washington DC for 4 days. The evening I got home, my son, wife and their little Diva's came over so we could have dinner together. Then my sister's and Mother arrived a little later, and we jumped in the car/truck and headed to the beach arriving after 10pm.  The mini-weekend vacation was anything but restful.  Then we left the beach on Monday and I got back to work on Tuesday trying to play catch-up for the rest of the week.  Then we had the pleasure of having the little Diva's spend the weekend while their parents were out of town.  It was awesome, fun and thrilling to experience life through their eyes for the weekend, and oh so tiring! But I still loved it. They got back on Sunday afternoon and then I left at 3:30pm to pick up the girls from work so we all could proceed to our state association's leadership conference about an 1 1/2 hour drive away.  We arrived around 5:30pm or so and left about an hour later, headed out to the Cheesecake Factory for dinner.  It was great, by the way. 

Got back to the hotel around 10pm~ish.  Today we got up at 6:30pm to start sharing a bathroom between us 3 females.  We went for breakfast and the classes began at 9:00 with an awards luncheon in between....followed by an expo with vendors following the class at 5:00pm.  Then...we were scheduled to go eat at the Chop House @ 7:00pm with a vendor that was "wooing" us...but, I bailed out.   Yep.  JUST SAID NO!  Everyone else went but me.  I thought..."if I have to go out one more time...even for good, free food, I will die"!  I just wanted to get in my pj's and crawl in the bed with my laptop on my lap and the TV on....and just relax.  That is where I am now...and doing just that.

I'm old.  I know it and accept it.  But, I just know one thing, I'm too tired to even eat....and besides, got class at 8:00 in the morning, leave for home at 3:00pm and then an all day fundraising Golf Tournament on Wednesday ...followed by the 7 hour trip  to Tennesee on Thursday...

I'm even more tired just thinking about it....maybe I'll be so exhausted that I will sleep on the way home Sunday...instead of crying the whole way back....I'm tired...no, I'm dog tired.                

Confessions of a Social Media Junkie!

My sister is a great blogger...(http://beth-thomas.blogspot.com/)  I love reading her post.  She has been blogging for some years  now and had made it seem so good but just didn't have much time for it.  So, always up for something new, I tried it...and failed.  I just didn't make the connection.  I noticed I blogged once in 2008 and once in 2009 and never "got" it. 


Well, something triggered in my brain about blogging lately.  I was in Washington DC at a Social Media Class for Home Care & Hospice 2 weeks ago.  They discussed the importance of blogging for marketing purposes.  Sharing thoughts or ideas.  Making the connection with your readers.  I came home on that Friday and left almost immediately to go to the beach with my sisters and Mother for the weekend.  When I got home on Monday, I had so many emotions and thoughts about my Mother's condition that I decided to put in on paper...so I opened up my old blog.  I had  forgotten the password, went through the process and got it up and running again.  And...a blog lover was born!!! 

I now crave it!  Sick huh?!?!?  I'm such a social media junkie.  Yes, I my space, twitter, linkedin, 3 email accounts and, well, in fb alone, I have 2 profiles and 3 pages that I administer!  Sick, I know!  Haven't done a You tube...but its on my list.   I've not had much free time this weekend with the Little Diva's here, but when I was able to squeeze in some time, I was reading blogs...or changing my background  (like 5 times!)...or looking at others backgrounds...  I LOVE BLOGGING!!!   I do everything is excess...unfortunately.

So, I've said all that for this...I'm leaving this afternoon for another conference for work.  Not sure I will have time for blogging...but no doubt, I will try and find an application for my crackberry!   

(This photo is from last years vacation at the beach...My husband, daughter and son's computer all open for business!   Hmmm.....maybe I'm not the only one with an addiction!)

~~~~later, Sue

The Little Diva's...

Poppy & I have the Little Diva's for the weekend. Their parents have gone to Knoxville to get things ready for their move next weekend. (That's another whole post!) But anyway, the Diva's are here!

One of their favorite things to do is put on makeup! At ages (almost)2 & 4, their girly side comes out in full force. Tell me they don't know what girls like! So, when they come to ZuZu's house, they know they have their own vanity loaded with fun stuff!

Ally, the 3 1/2 year old loves telling me she loves my blue eyes...meaning my kohl-blue eyeliner. So, when she proceeds to put on blue eyeshadow, heavy I might add, she then says "I look just like my Grandma ZuZu's blue eyes!"  Oh my, I certainly hope not!!! If that is how I look, then I definately need a makeover!!! Big time!

When the girls, I mean Little Diva's, are here, it reminds me of my age. God certainly knew what he was doing when he gave young women babies! They wear me out! Don't get me wrong, I love them here. But I'm truly exhausted...all the time. Their energy is endless, and being they are not at their own home, they want to be entertained!  Last night, after dinner, we walked to the pond, then back to our yard for trips in the wagon. How can pulling 2 small children in a wagon be tiring?!?!? But it was. Followed that up with a long fun bath...until the youngest decided to "poodle" in the pool...yuk!!! But so funny too! Poppy and I have to tag-team bath time so no one is left unattended. We're both old!!! Tonight, our routine will include pedicures with their choice of nail polish...have to look cute for church tomorrow of course!

Well, its 9:00am and I'm already tired. We've breakfasted on pancakes, played in the sunroom, watched a few of their faves on TV, and 30 minutes of make-up and "take off" time...I'm worn out!!! (...and YES...we got up way earlier than normal!)  But loving it!


Thank you God for these little diva's....what a joy!